It can be difficult to remain optimistic when times are hard and uncertain.

As a student who graduated recently from university, being positive and upbeat about my future is not the easiest thing to do.

But there are a number of lessons I’ve learned over the years – in the last few months, especially – that help me to maintain a positive mindset and be excited for what the future holds.

Here are 4 lessons I like to keep in mind when I think about having a positive mindset and generally being an optimistic person.

1. Failure is an opportunity to learn

There was a time when we were all young and failing at something was seen as one of the worst things you could possibly do. If you failed at something, it meant there was something bad about you.

But that isn’t the case anymore. Failure is not the polar opposite of success. There is something to be gained in achieving and not achieving something you want. Failure is an opportunity to learn something new. About yourself, or others, or the world around you.

Seeing failure as a learning opportunity is so important to building a positive mindset. The key is to always be a student and try to see what lessons you can take away from your experiences. Doing so will remove the negative view of failure in life and help you to change your perspective to be more positive.

2. Rejection closes the wrong doors

Sometimes it can be discouraging to hope and work hard for something, only to not see the work you did not pay off. Rejection is a lot like failure in that way. Whether it is rejection in your career, your relationship, etc.

Again, the trick is to change your perspective about your experiences. One thing I now understand – that I’ve seen repeated everywhere else – is this. Rejection closes the doors that are not meant for you.

The job you applied to – and didn’t get an interview for – is not meant for you. The person you dated once – whom didn’t want a second date – is not meant for you.

When you learn to read rejection as your guardian angel, it helps you to change your view on things and to build a positive mindset. See rejection as a means of narrowing down your options until you have a clearer path, one that will make you the happiest you can be. The things in your life that are meant for you will come to you in due time.

3. Small steps are as important as big ones

We can feel pressured by others or ourselves to go at maximum speed when trying to achieve a goal. This often leads to comparison to others and negative self-talk when we aren’t making the progress we want to have done.

But everyone’s journey is different. And you should only work at the pace where you’re most comfortable and confident. Small steps in the right direction help you to build momentum. So small steps are just as important as bigger steps when working to complete a goal.

Learning to be generous and gentle with yourself is key to creating a positive mindset. Celebrate each step in the right direction, even if it is the smallest one. You might not be able to do enough as those around you, but you’re doing what you’re able to with the time and energy you have to do it and that is okay.

4. Emotions are fleeting, not fixed

Recently I listened to a podcast episode that talked about self-love and self-confidence. The main takeaway was that we are the ones who get to decide how we feel about ourselves. We must focus on our inner appearance as well as how we look on the outside.

Emotions are fleeting, not fixed. It’s important to acknowledge any negative thoughts you have, but don’t let them overstay their welcome. It is just as important to promote positive self-talk. Replacing bad thoughts with good ones is so essential to personal growth and building a positive mindset.

This might be harder for some than others. I know it is something I still struggle with. The key is to let go of things that don’t support the life you want for yourself. If cynicism and negativity are holding you back, cut ties with them. Make them your acquaintances, not your best friends.

These are 4 lessons you need to keep in mind when building a positive mindset. To recap, failure is a chance to learn something new, rejection is guiding you down the right path, small steps are as important as big steps, and emotions are fleeting, not fixed.

On a final note, to have a positive mindset, you have to want the best for yourself. You need to recognize that you are deserving of great things and love yourself despite your flaws and failures. If life is about the journey and not the destination, then you need to learn to enjoy the journey. Its process and its progress.

Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist and the information in this blog post should not be used as a substitute for professional mental health advice and/or services. This post contains information based on my own personal experiences and is written for inspirational purposes. I am not liable for how you, the reader, chooses to interpret and use the information provided in this post.